Dear Mr. Blog,
Defeated. That word pretty much sums up my last month. Sometimes at night I didn't want to fall asleep because I knew that I would have to wake up and face the next day. Today I hit rock bottom. It was so sad that I started to laugh and cry at the same time. It was the worst. Have you ever laugh cried? I hope you haven't...it's confusing. It was just a bad bad month. Kind of like when you eat a grapefruit and it squirts in your eye....but feeling that every second of the day. It's stressful, and I can tell you that it takes way more energy to be sad than happy. Today, I studied from the second I woke up until 5pm. Then I took a test, and I failed. Mr. Blog, I have NEVER failed a test in my life...ever. And let me tell you something, IT FELT SO GOOD. It was liberating. I felt happy when I looked at the testing center screen and saw a 64%. Weird I know, but I failed and I was still okay, I was still breathing. Que *light bulb*. Then, I had an epiphany. Yeah, this month did SUCK HARD CORE. But guess what, that's life. Life is hard, it's messy and downright mean. I had a hard month, yes, but I learned a lot about myself and my potential. I lost eternal perspective. Don't ever let yourself do that! We were put here on this earth to learn, to struggle, to grow. The best part about it, is that we are NEVER alone. There is a plan. The plan of HAPPINESS. Even on my hardest day, I can still smile because I know that God loves me. How do I know that? Because He sent His Son Jesus Christ. What did he do for us? He paid the ultimate sacrifice. He atoned for my sins. He felt every pain. Every heartache. He descended below all. He did this because he loves us. And I love him. I love the healing power of the atonement. I love feeling my Saviors love. I am not alone. All I have to do is exercise faith, live the gospel, and serve others. It's simple really. Follow the plan. Keep eternal perspective. This life is short, don't waste it moping. Stand up. Work hard. Pray. It will all work out, I promise.